In celebration of Halloween, just a couple days away, InsightCity will relay the stupidest advice on candy eating ever written. NBC News interviewed Amy Gorin, a nutritionist, for advice on responsible candy consumption. See? I told you it was B.S. Here are the two takeaways: first, just eat one (nope) and second, hide the candy from yourself so you don’t overeat (trust me, I’ll remember where it is). The other thing they provide is a list of the healthiest options if you’re going to eat it. At the top is gummy worms—yawn—because a serving size is 8 worms. Second is snack-size Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups (now we’re talking) because they have some protein and fiber. But one puny cup contains 110 calories! The worst—in more ways than one—is candy corn. 19 terrible pieces of this garbage contain 140 calories of sadness. From a sugar addict’s perspective, we have 3 options: eat a bunch of candy and be happy, eat a bunch of candy and be sad, or eat a bunch of candy and be happy. Lucille Ball had it right.